Thursday, April 21, 2005

Funeral

I was able to bid farewell to my grandmother a few weeks ago. Laying her to rest was one of the oddest things to do in my life. I remember reading about Felecia’s family issues when her grandmother was dying in one of her ancient posts from way back. In any case, I thought how sad it is when all this old family drama arises when someone is passing. My mother, like Felecia, tried to take the high road on all these issues and made everyone feel welcomed and not ostracized during these emotional times. I was proud of my mother for this, I suppose she could have let little petty things eat away at her and thrown a fit when certain family members showed, but that’s not the way to lay someone to rest. Good job.

I suppose the individuals that I really felt for was my smallest nephew and niece. They took my grandmother – their great-grandmother’s passing really hard. I tried to comfort them in this difficult time and tried to reassure them that things will go on with the great memories of my grandmother. Yet, I remember being their age when both of my father’s parents were killed in a car accident. That one hit me really hard when I was their age. Till this day I don’t think I have ever really gotten over my grandfather’s passing. Odd as it may seem. That moment was very surreal and I can still see myself draped over him in his coffin crying. Setting here thinking of him I can even remember his scent when he use to hold me on his lap.

My great-grandmother showed which was nice. She is old now and has is very sharp still. Her and my grandmother didn’t talk much anymore for some reason. Yet, to see her as sad as she was reminded me of a mother’s bond with their child. It was one of the most beautiful things to see. I know that may sound odd, but it’s a bond that never can be broken…nuff said.

It was a cold and rainy day and everyone said their good-byes. I wanted to wait around while they laid her down. We in America have gotten so accustomed to doing everything fast and there is no tradition anymore. I remember as a kid we all put dirt on my grandfather’s grave, now they wanted everyone to walk away without lowering the casket. I suppose I can see in Mexican funerals they don’t do that. For the record, in Mexican funerals people throw themselves on the coffin in hopes of not letting them lower the casket. But for me this didn’t seem right with my grandmother. So the grounds keepers laid her down and I grabbed the shovel and started to lay dirt on her. I don’t know, I just didn’t want anyone else doing the shoveling. So there I was with the raid pouring down on me and with shovel in hand. My uncle came back to get me to go home but he also decided this was the thing to do and shoveled a bit on his mother.

This will be the last I write about this topic and I will now go back to poker, food and times in the city.

4 Comments:

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