Riding the 2/3 Express with F-Train

Ugarte held a home game yesterday in Brooklyn. So why does this title read like it does, I will get to that later.

First, let’s get this straight, I’m a Manhattan Snob. I don’t venture out of the city much…actually there was a whole year that I didn’t leave Manhattan, not even to go to California. I just stayed on this little island and ran amuck. In any case, venturing out to Brooklyn is always fun and the place has really changed over the years. There is such thing as a Brooklyn Snob, too. But they tend to be trust fund kids that live in Williamsburg and act like starving artist. Nuff said.

So I get off the train and I’m lost. I catch a cab and she wants to run me to the other side of Brooklyn. Call my sister to check my email from her home in Az. to get me directions because mine must read wrong (according to the female cabbie). All along I’m squeezing my butt cheeks because I have to use the restroom. I finally yell at the cabbie…find me a bathroom before we go any further…she drops me at the Circuit City and I tell her I will find another cab. I do my business at Circuit City, but only after waiting for a lady that was in there washing her hands for an hour.

I’m informed that I had the correct address…bad cabbie. I get in a new cab and I remember that I should never catch a yellow cab in Brooklyn…always a Gypsy Cab they know the lay of the land better since many live in the neighborhood they patrol.

I get to the game and there are only four of us. Here I am running around and squeezing my butt cheeks to get to the game on time and there are only four of us…pure humor. I’m informed a few more will trickle in soon. But truth be told, I was in no rush.

Right off the bat I take note that Ugarte has provided two new deck of cards…SAWEEET! I hate going to a home game where some of the cards may be marked or are old and bent. They were in the wrapper still…kind of like me before sex. O.K. too much information. Serious readers don’t go in bare back without the bare facts. Enough of my public service announcement. Not to mention that the WSOP is on TV and that was funny because we were all rooting against The Grinder…he and his posse are such asses.

The game starts and people trickle in. Its no-limit and you know how I suck at this game. I think I got pushed off of so many hands but who cares…I’m still learning the warfare of this game.

Big Hand #1: F-Train pushes with DA HAMMA (as Boston folk say) and is up against A-K…of course, in the blogger mind set...this is a great call by F-Train. No one hits until the RIO. Guess who hit? Yep, F-Train hit the big 2 on the river. Talk about fishing for a card, but in bloggers minds: Never question the power of DA HAMMA!

F-Train controls the table for most of the night and then he gets loose as a goose and starts to bleed his huge stack away. Buy in for us was 1,000.00…o.k. not really but I just wanted to wake my one reader up (mom, stay awake and act interested).

I was playing solid and picking up some hands here and there after my second buy-in (someone broke me and I think it was Ugrate...can't remember or selective memory.

Big Hand #2: I had a nice stack when I was dealt A-K and re-raised the fist raiser. He pushed and I called (AK v. QQ). Flop: K-K-10. Not home free a Q would make me a dork for calling. Then on the Turn: A…yes, hit the Casa (house)!!!

Another hand was against Dawn. She flopped the NUTZ against my two pairs and she was playing it sneaky. She checked all the way down and I was thinking…I could probably steal here if I push. After thinking and thinking I folded…I knew I heard the Star Spangled Banner going off somewhere in the distance…too bad it wasn’t in my head as my two pairs were dead.

Big Hand #3: Oh, I forgot, I hit the river flush on Ugrate’s brother. I had two pair and I had to call the bet. OK if you want to know the truth...I was a donkey and bet the draw, but it did hit.

It was a great time and everyone was friendly and having a great time. If this game continues to go on it will be well worth the trip out to Brooklyn. Yet, the humor that flows here is mean and tasteless...don't worry, comedians love see that as a complement. But to be honest, funny people populate the game. No examples, some things that were said should stay at the table given the humor they presented.

Oh, and for the title of this post. I ended up riding home with F-Train on the 2/3 Express. Thus, he’s an imposter when he uses the F-Train name…his blog should be called: 2/3 Express….stupid NYC humor.

posted by Joaquin "The Rooster" Ochoa @ 11:02 AM